T.J. Ford “I Can’t Feel My Body” - NBA

大家好，昨天半夜看到T.J. Ford發表在The Player's Tribune的文章，覺得相當感人，
因此決定稍微翻譯一下來與各位分享。
沒想到存進暫存後剛剛想要重發發現存檔失蹤，因此先貼個英文原文上來一下，
稍後會繼續編輯文章加上翻譯，還請見諒!

(17:45 文章已經翻譯完成)

文章內主要是講述他面對傷痛折磨的心路歷程以及退休之後的生活。
如果是2000年初期就開始看NBA的球迷應該都對這位球員有些印象。
速度飛快的他與Tony Parker分別被稱作美製福特跑車以及法國小跑車。
球風硬朗又有侵略性，但傷病真的讓他的球員生涯相當辛苦。
而他最後被大鬍子Baron Davis頂傷導致退休的畫面我到現在還歷歷在目QQ。
文章相當長，或許該分成上下兩篇的XD，但這對不常使用PCMAN的我來說實在有點困難。
如果對內容有其他看法還請多指教，排版或是有其他問題還請多多包涵!

原文連結: https://goo.gl/SXGJz4

以下正文

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The first time I was paralyzed was during a pickup game.

I was a sophomore at the University of Texas, and it was the same week that I
had hired an agent and declared for the 2003 NBA draft.

我第一次感到全身麻痺是在一場鬥牛賽。
我當時是德州大學的二年級生，同時也是我聘請經紀人以及
宣布投入2003NBS選秀會的同一個禮拜。

This wasn’t an ordinary pickup game. Some Longhorn football players were
playing against a few of the guys on the basketball team. This was when we
were coming off of our first Final Four appearance in 56 years and the
football team was one of the best in the country. I’m not exaggerating when
I tell you that all 4,000 seats in Gregory Gym were full — and then some. It
was a crazy-loud atmosphere. Vince Young and Roy Williams were on the floor.
It was legit.

那並不是一場普通的鬥牛。一些長角牛美足校隊*(註一)的隊員正和一些籃球隊員對決。
當時的我們才打進56年來第一次的NCAA錦標賽四強，
同時我們的美足校隊也是國內數一數二的強權。
如果我說當時Gregory體育館裡的4000個座位近乎被觀眾坐滿，那我並不是在誇大。
當時館內的氛圍實在火熱，Vince Young跟Roy Williams*(註二)也在場上。
這真的非常的特別。

註一: 長角牛(Longhorns)是德州大學奧斯丁分校的校隊暱稱。
就跟北卡大的Tarheels以及UCLA的Bruins(棕熊)一樣。

註二: Vince Young跟Roy Williams都是當時德州大學美足的明星球員，
後來也有成功踢進NFL，分別擔任四分衛以及外接員。


This was the last time a lot of these people would ever see me play in
Austin. I had just been named the national player of the year, and I was
headed to the NBA. I wanted to play lights out.

這可能會是人們最後一次看我在奧斯丁打球，而我也被選為年度最佳球員，
正朝著NBA邁進，我只想要點亮整個體育館。

At one point, I was driving to the basket when a defender reached toward me
to try to get in my way. My body spun around and my head somehow ended up
slamming against the thigh of my best friend, Royal Ivey.

當時我正往籃下切入，一個防守者擋住了去路，碰撞後的身體失去平衡，
而我的頭則撞上了我最好的朋友Royal Ivey*(註三)的大腿。

註三: Royal Ivey也有打進NBA，曾效力於七六人以及老鷹。

Bam!

The next thing I remember, I was on the ground and I felt … nothing.

蹦!
我所記得的下一件事，就是我躺在地上，而且感受不到任何東西。

I tried to push myself up so that I was sitting, but my arms wouldn’t move.
I had no feeling below my neck.

我試著撐起身體想要坐起來，但我的手臂卻完全動不了。
我的脖子以下毫無知覺。

At that moment, the only thing running through my head was the NBA. I was
being projected as a top five pick. How could this happen now? I was scared.

當下我腦中所想的第一件事就是NBA，我當時被認為會在前五順位被選上，
這一切怎麼發生的? 我嚇壞了。

I admit, it probably wasn’t wise for me to be messing around in a game like
that right before the draft, but up until that point I always felt invincible
on the basketball court — no doubts, no fear.

我承認在選秀會前夕參加鬥牛並不明智，但當時的我覺得我在球場上是無敵的，
毫無疑問，一無所懼。

After 10 minutes, I was still numb. I stopped thinking about the NBA and
started to worry about my health. Medics arrived with a stretcher to take me
to the hospital.

過了10分鐘，我還是完全麻木。我不再去思考NBA之路會如何，
開始擔心未來的身體狀況。醫護人員到場之後用擔架將我送到了醫院。

After 20 minutes, I still had no feeling below my neck and I started to
totally freak out. I suddenly began to wonder if I would ever walk again.
Never mind basketball, what would life be like if I never regained feeling?

20分鐘之後，頸部以下還是沒有知覺，我真的嚇壞了。
我開始懷疑我能否再次以雙腳走路。
不再去想籃球，重要的是我以後的生活會不會就這樣癱瘓了?

After 30 minutes, I felt tingling in my arms, legs and feet. I almost wanted
to cry because I was so relieved.

After two hours, I regained feeling in the rest of my body, but I wouldn’t
get back to normal for two weeks.

30分鐘過了，我的手臂，以及雙腳開始出現一點刺痛感，
這如釋重負的感覺真的讓我快要哭了出來。

之後的兩小時，我開始感受到我身體的其餘部分，
但在未來的兩個禮拜內我都無法正常的活動。

My hope was that it had just been a freak accident. An anomaly. But it wasn’
t. It would be the first of many instances of temporary paralysis that I
would experience during my basketball career. And with each successive
episode, I would always ask myself the same questions.

當時的我認為這只是人生中的一個意外，但這並不是。
這反而是我接下來籃球生涯中多次暫時癱瘓的起點。
而在每一次受傷之後，我都會問自己同樣的問題。

Is this it?

Is this the one that’s going to be permanent?

我的球員生涯結束了嗎?
這次會不會造成永久性的傷害?

My relationship with basketball didn’t start on a court. It began in the
kitchen of a trailer in Baytown, Texas.

我與籃球的接觸並不開始於球場上，而是在德州Baytown的一個拖車廚房裡。

I was four years old when Santa brought my older brother Tim and I a couple
of those plastic Little Tikes basketball hoops. Both of us were raised to be
basketball fans. My dad played in rec leagues into his 50s and he bought my
brother and I whatever gear he could afford. My brother had a Magic Johnson
uniform — jersey and shorts — and I had one for Michael Jordan, my favorite
player.

聖誕老人給了四歲的我以及我哥哥Tim一組塑膠籃球玩具組。
我跟我哥從小就被培養成籃球迷，我爸曾在地方聯盟打球一直打到他50多歲，
而他也會盡他所能買一些籃球裝備給我跟我哥。
我哥有一套魔術強森的配備，包含球衣球褲，而我所擁有的則是我的最愛，Jordan。

From that point on my brother and I would play full court — kitchen to
living room — pretty much whenever we could. I’d like to think MJ got the
best of most of those matchups.

從那時起我跟我哥就會在基本上所有可行的時間內在廚房到客廳之間打起全場籃球，
而穿著Jordan的我應該是佔盡上風的。

As a teenager I played at the local YMCA, and that’s where I really fell in
love with the game. I was never the biggest kid in the gym, but from early on
I had a desire to be great. It seemed ridiculous to say out loud, but I
wanted to be the best point guard in the NBA one day.

青少年時期的我在地方上的YMCA打球，這也是我真正愛上籃球的開始。
我從來不是場上塊頭最大的球員，但我從很早開始就有想要變強的慾望。
雖然說起來有點荒唐，但當時的我就是想要成為NBA的最強控衛。

There was a lot of athletic talent where I grew up, but not much mentorship
and guidance. Because of that, not many guys from my neighborhood made it to
college. Even the ones who did get offered scholarships would often end up
making mistakes and losing them. I wanted to break that cycle. I wanted to be
the first person from my family to go to college, and, God willing, to play
in the NBA.

在我成長的地區其實有很多天分很好的運動員，但都沒有受到很好的指導，
所以在社區內成功讀到大學的人其實很少。就算是有拿到獎學金的人，
也很常因為犯錯而導致失去了這些機會。我想要打播這個循環。
我想要成為我家族裡第一位成功讀到大學的人，
甚至老天保佑的話，打進NBA。

In high school my team went 75–1 in my junior and senior seasons and won two
state championships. I also played on the AAU circuit, competing against top
players from around the country. I learned firsthand that I could compete
with anyone, and soon the scholarship offers came.

高三高四的我時期的我帶領校隊取得75-1的戰績並奪下兩個州冠軍。
同時我也有在AAU打球，與當時全國各地的菁英互相競爭。
我意識到我能夠與任何人匹敵，也開始得到來自各大學的獎學金招募。

Around that time, I met Rick Barnes, who was the coach at Texas.

This was before the Longhorns had any sort of clout in basketball circles.
Before Kevin Durant, before LaMarcus Aldridge, before Tristan Thompson and
before Avery Bradley and so many other future NBA players chose Texas.

大概在那個時候，我遇到了Rick Barnes*(註四)，德州大學的教練。

註四: Rick Barnes也算是NCAA男籃的名教練，帶領德州大學取得不錯的成績。
印象中現在在西冠對決的KD與LA好像都是他的子弟兵，LA其實是KD的學長。

The idea that I would even consider Texas confused some people. This was a
time when, if you were a top basketball player in the state of Texas, you
looked to go out of state for college. Simple as that. But my mom liked the
university and saw an opportunity for me to create a legacy there. She saw
the opportunity for me to create a tradition rather than to just become part
of one. And she liked Coach Barnes.

I did too.

我考慮加入德州大學的這個想法其實讓很多人感到困惑。
因為當時德州的頂尖籃球員都傾向於就讀別州的強權學校。
但我媽喜歡德州大學，並且也看到了我可以創造屬於自己的成就的機會，
同時她也喜歡Barnes教練，而我也是。

I liked that he didn’t promise me that I’d make it to the NBA. In fact, we
didn’t really talk that much about basketball during the recruiting process.
Instead he sold me on a different vision. He told me what it would mean in a
larger context if a player like myself were to decide to attend Texas. He
told me how much it would mean to the program for me to be a Longhorn, what
it would mean to my family and to the state as whole. Coaches say a lot of
stuff while they’re trying to recruit you, but what made me respect Coach
Barnes was that he looked me directly in the eyes the entire time we spoke.
He talked to me like a man, and promised to treat me like one. So I agreed to
help him build a foundation for the program.

他贈沒有承諾我一定打得近NBA，我欣賞這點。
事實上在招募階段我們甚至不常討論籃球，他帶給我不同的視野。
他告訴我一個像我這樣的球員加入德州大學的話會帶來多大的影響。
他告訴我如果我決定成為長角牛的一員，會帶來多大的改變，不論是對我的家庭，
甚至是對整個德州都是。
教練們在行招募時都有各自的長篇大論，但Barnes教練讓我尊敬的地方是
他對我說話時都直視著我的眼睛，把我當成一個男人在與我溝通。
所以我答應與他一同建立德州大學籃球隊的基礎。

And ultimately, that’s exactly what we did. When I was a sophomore, we made
it to the Final Four and I won both the Wooden and Naismith awards as the the
national player of the year. Now, the NBA wasn’t just a pipe dream. It was
calling me.

I felt like I was on top of the world.

而事實上，這也是我們最後所實際達成的。
在我大二那年，我們打進了錦標賽四強，而且我同時以年度最佳球員的身分
獲頒伍登獎以及奈史密斯獎。
NBA對我來說不再只是個夢想，而是個近在咫尺的目標。

我就像是站在世界的頂端。

And then, after that one day in Gregory Gym, it seemed like everything might
come crashing down.

但就在Gregory體育館的那天過後，一切都變了。

The first time I heard the term spinal stenosis was the summer after my
senior year of high school.

我第一次聽說脊椎狹窄症候群是在我高四的時候。

Spinal stenosis is a narrowing of the open spaces in your spine, which puts a
lot of pressure on your spinal cord and the nerves in the spine that connect
to your arms and legs. The cartilage in your spine wears away, so there’s
not much to absorb hits, which is tough when you play a physical sport like
basketball. When doctors first discovered it, my family considered surgery,
but since it hadn’t affected the way I played up to that point, it didn’t
seem super necessary. I didn’t really think twice about it.

脊椎狹窄症群會壓縮脊椎的神經，並對手臂或腿部造成影響。所以這對籃球
之類的激烈運動影響很大。醫師在我身上發現這個問題的時候，
我的家人考慮過開刀，但由於這個問題並沒有對我場上的表現帶來影響，
因此手術似乎並不必要，我甚至沒有考慮過第二遍。

That injury at Gregory Gym was the first time I experienced severity of the
condition. But fortunately, the incident happened before the age of social
media, which would have caused a story about a potential lottery pick getting
injured to spread like wildfire. The injury didn’t end up affecting my draft
status too much. The Milwaukee Bucks, who knew about my diagnosis, selected
me with the eighth pick in the draft.

在Gregory體育館的受傷是我第一次體會到這個問題的嚴重性。
但幸運的是，當時社群媒體不算發達，因此有樂透候選受重傷的消息
並沒有像野火一樣傳播開來。而這次傷勢也沒有對我的選情有太大影響。
公鹿隊在對我的傷勢知情的情況下在第八順位挑選了我。

I had a promising start to my career. I mean, it was a trip, for sure. Every
night I was playing against the likes of Kobe Bryant, Vince Carter, Allen
Iverson — it was surreal. And even after games when I had gotten my ass
kicked, I was able to keep my chin up because I was living my dream. I was
right on schedule.

我的NBA生涯開始的相當不錯，這就像是場旅程。
每晚我都在與Kobe，VC，AI等球員同場較勁，這超不真實的。
就算是在被痛宰的比賽之後，我還是能保持著微笑，因為這就像是場夢。
一切都在計畫之內。

Fifty-four games into my rookie season, I was feeling great. I was leading
the team in assists and my minutes kept going up. But in my 55th game,
everything changed.

菜鳥年打完54場比賽之後，我感覺相當不錯。我是隊上的助攻王，
上場時間也逐步增加。但在我的第55場比賽，一切風雲變色。

We were playing the Minnesota Timberwolves and I subbed into the game midway
through the fourth quarter. A minute after I entered the game, I was coming
off a pick-and-roll driving to the basket — something I had done thousands
of times before — and when I went up for a layup, I collided with Mark
Madsen. I landed hard on my tailbone. I felt a jolt of pain, and then once
again, nothing.

在與灰狼隊的比賽之中，我在第四節中段被換上場。一分鐘過後，
我在一次擋拆之後切入籃下準備上籃，這個動作我早已做過數千次，
我撞上了Mark Madsen，脊椎著地。
一陣短暫的痛楚過後，我再次的毫無知覺。

As I was on the ground, I remember Kevin Garnett and Sam Cassell, my mentor,
coming over to me and yelling, “Get up, get up!”

I told them I couldn’t. I couldn’t move at all.

“I can’t feel my body,” I said, laying motionless on the floor, in shock.

在我倒地時，我還記得我的良師益友，KG跟Sam Cassell，過來對我喊著起來。
我告訴他們: 我無法，我完全沒辦法動。我感受不到我的身體。
六神無主的倒在地上，我嚇傻了。

This happened almost exactly one year after the incident at Gregory Gym, so I
had some idea of what was going on. But still, it was terrifying. As I was
taken off the court on a stretcher, many thoughts were going through my mind.
But one thing I was sure of was that I would come back from this.

這幾乎就發生在Gregory體育館事件之後的一年，所以我對大概情況還有些頭緒。
但這一切還是非常可怕。
當我被用擔架抬出場時，腦中一片混亂，但我確定我能夠再回到球場上。

I was the only player in the NBA with spinal stenosis. The trainers did their
best but there wasn’t really a road map for treatment that I was supposed to
follow. The question became should I have surgery or should I just recover
naturally like I had before?

我是全NBA唯一有脊椎狹窄症的，訓練員盡力的幫助我，但這一切並無先例。
現在的問題是我究竟是該動手術，還是就跟上次一樣讓傷勢自然復原。

I saw more than 10 doctors. Each one of them had a slightly different
recommendation. Ultimately, I made the decision to go ahead and undergo
surgery — a fusion of my C-3 and C-4 vertebra. The surgeon said that by
fusing together some of the bones in my neck, I would have a better chance of
extending my career.

Sounds great, right?

我看過了超過十名醫師，每個都有一些不同的見解。
最後我決定開刀，這樣說不定能更加延長我的球員生涯。
聽起來不錯，對吧?

But there was some bad news: The surgery would force me to sit out for an
entire year.

That was devastating.

但動手術對我來說就是要讓我整季休賽了，這對我來說真是個壞消息。

I watched the rest of that season from a hospital bed. But even though I
missed the last month and a half of the season, I was still named to the NBA
All-Rookie second team.

我在病床上旁觀了球隊接下來的賽季，而雖然我缺席了相當長時間的賽季，
我最後還是入選了年度新秀第二隊。

I moved back home to recover from the surgery. I was surrounded by people who
loved me and took care of me, but I can’t recall ever feeling so helpless. I
couldn’t play ball. Hell, I couldn’t even carry a bag of groceries into the
house if I wanted to. Doing even five push-ups required all my strength and
concentration.

我回家持續休養，被一群愛著我，關心我的人們圍繞著。但我還是感到很無助。
我沒辦法打球，甚至連提包雜物進房子都沒辦法。
做個五下伏地挺身就耗盡了我全身的氣力。

After several frustrating months, I was finally medically cleared to start
playing again. I started training with coach John Lucas, and even though I
showed progress physically, I was a complete wreck mentally. One of my
strengths as a player had always been my confidence. If there was a spot on
the court I wanted to get to, I knew my body could figure out a way to get
there. But now I didn’t know what my limitations were. I felt a step slower.
I was hesitant. So the real work became rebuilding my psyche. I pushed myself
back to full strength.

艱難的度過了幾個月的康復期後。我終於被允許再次回到球場上。
我開始與John Lucas教練訓練，雖然在體能上進展不錯，
但在精神層面我卻被打倒了。
我身為籃球員的一大優勢就是我的自信。
如果我在場上有個想去的地方，我就能找到方式成功切入。
但我現在卻不知道我的極限在哪裡。我感受到我變慢了，也遲疑了。
真正需要克服的是重建我的自信心，我想要再次爬回巔峰。

And eventually I did.

而我也成功做到了。

I returned to the NBA on November 1, 2005 against the Philadelphia 76ers. I
was one rebound shy of a triple double in that game. One rebound. I was back,
man. That year I stayed healthy for the entire season.

我在2005年11月1日對決七六人的比賽復出，那場比賽我差一個籃板就達到大三元。
就差一個籃板。 這也代表我回來了，那一季我整季都保持百分百的狀態。

That off-season, Milwaukee traded me to the Toronto Raptors, where I began
playing the best basketball of my life. Everything clicked for me, and once
again I stayed healthy for the entire season. There was even a two-week
stretch when I nearly averaged a triple double a game.

賽季結束後，公鹿將我交易到了暴龍，在多倫多我開始了生涯顛峰。
一切都很順利，身體整季也都保持健康，
我甚至有一段兩個禮拜的時期平均達到大三元。

Then, the following year, during a game against the Atlanta Hawks, my luck
changed in an instant.

但就在下一年，一場面對老鷹的比賽中，我的運氣又突然急轉直下。

We were up by eight late in the fourth quarter. The game was just about
wrapped up. I stole the ball near the basket we were defending and had what
looked to be a clear path to a layup. But as I went up, Al Horford jumped up
and tried to block ball from behind. He ended up hitting me right on the head
and I lost feeling in my body in midair. It felt like someone hit me with a
hammer.

我們在第四節末段領先八分，比賽將要結束。我抄到球之後一條龍快攻，
但就在我跳起來準備上籃的時候，Al Horford也躍起試圖蓋我火鍋。
但結局是他給了我的頭部狠狠一擊，而我也在半空中失去平衡。
這感覺就像是有人拿槌子直接槌在我身上。

It was a freak play. He apologized immediately. But this injury was different
for me. When this had happened before, I immediately had the will to get up
and try to continue my basketball career. That’s all I ever really thought
about. But this time I had no idea if my body would actually respond. I’d
already had surgery to make sure this wouldn’t happen again. I was truly
afraid that this might be the injury that paralyzed me permanently.

這真的是瘋狂的一擊。他在當下立刻道歉了，但這次傷勢跟以往都不同。
在之前的經歷中，我都會有爬起來並繼續為我的籃球生涯奮戰的動力，
這是我唯一的想法。
但這次我不知道我的身體會有怎樣的回應，
我已經為了避免這種情況發生而動過手術了。
我真的很怕這次的傷勢會讓我永久性的癱瘓。

On that night in Atlanta, as I was taken off the court on a stretcher once
again, I was ready to just quit. For the first time in my life, I didn’t
want to play basketball anymore. I felt so much frustration.

在亞特蘭大的那個夜晚，我再次被擔架抬出場，
我已經做好要放棄的心理準備。
在我人生中我第一次不想再繼續碰籃球，我的心思被沮喪所佔據。

By this point, there was no mystery about what was going on with me. Everyone
in the league knew my history. Now I had to consider more deeply why I was
actually doing this. I certainly wasn’t the only one who thought it might be
time for me to step away from the game.

在這個時間點，我的情況並不是個謎團。
聯盟裡的每個人都知道我所經歷過的傷勢。
現在我必須做更深入的打算，我應該不是唯一一個認為這是我該放棄籃球的時候了。

But after giving it some thought, I decided that I just couldn’t walk away.

I’m one of the only people from my neighborhood to have made it out.
Basketball did that.

I’m the first person from my family to attend college. Basketball did that.

And I now had the opportunity to set an example for the next generation. That
was what motivated me to come back.

但在思考之後，我發現我沒辦法就這樣放棄。

我是家鄉裡少數出人頭地的人，是籃球造就了這一切。

我是家族裡第一個上大學的人，是籃球造就了這一切。

而我現在有機會成為下個世代的榜樣，這是我再次回到球場的動力。

I gave the game everything I had for four more years, and though I had a
couple more scares, I kept playing.

我在接下來的四年為籃球奉獻一切，就算我心中仍有恐懼，我還是繼續在場上奮戰。


Finally, on March 12, 2012, we were playing a game against the Knicks, and I
was going after a rebound. I remember the ball hitting the rim, and as I was
looking up, Baron Davis, who’s a friend of mine, boxed me out and nudged me
a little bit to get position. I immediately dropped to the floor.

最終在2012年3月12日，在一場與尼克隊的比賽中，我正要去爭搶一個籃板。
我還記得籃球彈框而出，而我正盯著球看，
我的好朋友Baron Davis為了卡位而頂了我一下，我當下就倒地了。

Tim was actually at that game and was able to get down onto the court to give
me some support. I was surrounded by trainers and teammates, and the entire
arena was silent as I was just lying there. After a few minutes I regained
some feeling but I still couldn’t move.

Tim*(註六)當時就在場上給我一些幫助，我也被訓練演及隊友圍繞著，
整座球場也因為我的倒下而陷入沉默。
數分鐘後我的身體開始有了些知覺，但我還是不能動。

註六: Tim應該是指Tim Duncan，但我在受傷影片中並沒有特別看到TD的身影。

This time, I wasn’t thinking about my basketball career. Now I was thinking
about my brother, the person who it all began with, seeing me in that state.
I was thinking about my two little kids at home, who didn’t know what was
wrong with their dad.

這次，我沒有再去思考我的籃球生涯，我想到的是我的哥哥，
一個從一開始就陪伴在我身邊的人，就在場邊看著我。
我還想到了家中的兩個孩子，他們可能根本不懂爸爸發生了什麼事情。

I knew that this might be the end, and I didn’t want to get carried out on a
stretcher. Not this time. That wasn’t going to be the last image NBA fans
had of me.

我意識到這可能是結束的時候了，而這次我不想再被擔架抬出場了。
這次不會! 這不會是我留在NBA球迷心中的最後印象。

My teammates tried to help me up, but I just fell right back down.

我的隊友們試著扶我起來，但我還是再次倒了下去。

After a while I found the strength to at least stiffen by body so that I
wouldn’t fall again. With the support of a couple of guys, I hobbled toward
the locker room.

再過了一陣子，我恢復了足夠支撐身體的力量，讓我不會再次倒下。
這次我在身邊人們的扶持下，蹣跚地走向休息室。

By the time I got to the end of the tunnel the feeling in my body had come
back, but my arms felt like they weighed 1,000 pounds each.

就在我走入通到盡頭時，我身體的力量已經漸漸恢復，
但我的手臂就像是有1000磅那麼的沉重。

And it was that moment, next to my brother in the tunnel, when I knew for
certain that I was going to retire from the NBA.

就在這刻，我的兄弟在通道內陪著我，我終於知道這是時候退休了。

My motivation to keep playing as long as I did was simple. I wanted to change
lives. I wanted to make life better for my family. And I wanted to inspire
people in my neighborhood. I wanted to show them how far they could go if
they never quit.

一直以來，我持續在球場上奮戰的原因很簡單，我想改變人們的人生。
我想要改善家的生活，我也想啟發我社區的人們。
我想讓他們了解如果他們不放棄的話，可以在人生的路上走到多遠。

But what I didn’t fully appreciate until I left the game was that I didn’t
need to be playing in the NBA to change lives in a positive way. I didn’t
need to make an All-Star team in order to inspire kids. My goal in life was
always to become the best point guard in the world. And god damn, I gave it
everything I could. But what I came to realize was that if I had the drive to
push myself to reach for that goal, I also had the ability to try to make a
difference in other ways.

但一直到我退出球場之後我才了解到，我並不一定要在NBA打球才能
帶給人們正面的影響。我並不一定要成為全明星球員才能夠帶給孩子們啟發。
我的目標一直是成為世界上最好的控衛，而我也為此用盡一切所能。
但我在此時意識到，當我在為這個目標努力的時候，
我已經有在許多不同的地方帶給人們影響了。

So I use the same determination that had let me come back from the injuries,
and I redirected it outward. That’s what motivated me to start the TJ Ford
Basketball Academy, where I mentor kids from where I grew up and teach them
life skills through playing the game that I love. Hard work, integrity, good
attitude…all the things my parents and coaches taught me, I’m now passing
on to another generation. But what I now understand is that it’s not enough
to just about develop a crossover or a jump shot. There’s life beyond
basketball. So as part of my mission, I also help provide the educational
resources and mentorship that these kids need in order to not only make it
college, but stay there.

所以我開始用我全力克服傷痛的決心來做出貢獻。
這就是我創辦T.J. Ford籃球學院的動機，一個我能透過我所愛的籃球來
教導孩子們人生道理的地方，努力，正直，良好的態度等等，
這些都是我的父母所教我的，我正助攻給我們的下一代。
我同時也理解到重點不是過人以及跳投的技巧，重要的是籃球背後的生活。
所以我還有另外一項任務，那就是提供教育資源給需要的孩子，
希望能幫助他們不只能夠上大學，還要能夠畢業。

Since it began, more than 50 kids who have participated in the academy have
landed scholarships. That really means something to me. It means a whole lot.

在計畫開始之後，有超過50個參加TJ籃球學院的孩子成功得到獎學金，
這對我來說意義重大，真的很重要。

And I’m also looking forward to setting an example for them in another way.
This Friday, May 19, I’m going to take one of the most important walks of my
life. I’m going to take a walk that nobody in my family ever has before me.
A walk almost 15 years in the making.

我同時也在想辦法從其他方面樹立榜樣，
就在這個禮拜五，5月19日，我將步入我人生中的另一階段。
我將完成我家族中沒有其他人所能夠達到的目標，一段花了將近15年才達成的成就。

I’m going to walk across the stage at the University of Texas’ commencement
ceremony and receive my college diploma in Applied Learning and Development:
Youth and Community Studies, with a minor in Educational Psychology. In some
ways, I think the experience will provide some closure on a certain chapter
of my life. But in other ways, it also represents yet another new beginning
for me.

我將踏上德州大學畢業典禮的頒獎台並且領取我在應用學習發展、
少年與社區研究以及教育心理的文憑。
這將是我一個人生階段的結束，但這也代表了我人生將會有一段新的開始。

If it wasn’t for the injuries I suffered, I’m not sure I’d be doing any of
this. I put so much of myself into the game of basketball that it took up all
of my energy and focus. But ultimately, it took having the game taken away
from me to get a better understanding of who I really am, and what’s
important.

如果沒有經歷過這些病痛的話，我不認為我會為了這些文憑而努力。
我為了籃球奉獻了一切，這反而讓我失去了心力去嘗試其他新事物。
但在最後，我失去了在球場上奮戰的機會，
但這也讓我更了解到我自己的人生意義，以及人生中其他重要的事情。

Honestly, if I had to do my life all over again knowing I would end up in
this same position, I would. I would do it in a second.

老實說，如果我需要再重新經歷這一切的話，
我相信我不會有任何遲疑，我會二話不說地再次為這一切努力。

Because in my lowest moments, I couldn’t feel anything.

因為在我人生的最低點，我感受不到任何知覺。

But now, I’m driven by a new purpose — and I feel better than ever.

但現在，我的人生有了新的意義，而我的感覺也前所未有的美好。

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